February 27, 2010

Brotherly Love

My parents came up for a visit this weekend, which apparently gives the kid's rights to act like hellions. Don't let the picture above fool you. It may look sweet and innocent but I'm here to tell you the real deal.
Now granted we do have our sweet moments, where the boys are happy to see each other and have a good laugh or two, but when my parents come to town, the boys are determined to show them that they are definitely being "raised in a barn".

Let's see, where do I start? Maybe with the horror on my mom's face when Nate crushed Jack by using him as a stepping stool. Or maybe I should start with counting the number of times I used the expression, "Have you lost your mind?"

And the answer to the question above....Yes, I did lose my mind. Although nobody was asking ME.

My mom and I made a prison break to the mall where I picked up a book at Pottery Barn kids titled, "What Brother's Do Best". I anxiously opened it only to read the fluffy first line, "Brothers can share a delicious snack."
Maybe it was the mood I was in after having spent the day with my two angels, but I wanted the book to be a bit more realistic. I rewrote it. Here is my version of what "Brother's Do Best."

  • Brother's share toothbrushes - even when the oldest one has no idea.
  • Brother's give each other love taps...in the form of a pummel to the floor and never look back.
  • Brother's teach you how to sing....while the other is trying to watch T.V.
  • Brother's will help you find a toy.....the one they haven't played with in 4 years and now claim as their favorite.
  • Brother's will look out for your safety.....and recommend a "fair" punishment when you break a rule.
  • Brother's will show you how to climb..... out of a crib, on to a table, and to your death.
  • Brother's will share in bathtime fun....by empting the tub.
  • Brother's will help ensure you are up to date on your tetanus shots.....with their very sharp little teeth.
O.K. so maybe this might be a rough read before bedtime, but the illustrations would be worth every penny. The best part of the book is that when you flip it over, you can read what "Sister's Do Best." I can't wait to rewrite that one.


Anne said...

I can't wait to write my blog- It will be what Mothers do best!

Ride Operator said...

Very funny Mom!